Annie the Tribble

Annie is an affectionate dog, and by affectionate, I mean a pain in the ass.  Annie loves everyone. If you sit down, she will run up to you with her tail a-waggin’ then jam her head into your lap, looking up at you with those big brown why aren’t you petting me? eyes. Of course the eyes are just a distraction from the dripping wet drool-laden lips that just soaked your pants, but that’s all part of the game. You see, in the language of Newfoundland dogs, drool = love.

If, after a reasonably long time—say, one-third of a second—you haven’t begun to pet her, she will then take her pointy nose, jam it under your arm and flip your hand up on top of her head where it belongs. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll commence with the petting, or it will just get worse. Actually that’s not true; it always gets worse. (more…)

My Cozy

Cozy and her Kong
In every dog lover’s life, there is one special dog. For me, Cozy was that dog.

Cozy came into our lives in August of 1997 when we were still just newlyweds in a big empty house. Before we had decided on a name, she was just “little blue puppy” because the breeder had tied a blue piece of yarn around her neck. All the puppies in the litter had colored yarn around their necks, but it was the little blue puppy who nudged my elbow and picked me so many years ago. From that moment on, My Cozy and I shared a bond unlike any I’ve shared with any other dog, or person for that matter. (more…)

Annie and the Vacuum

The "I'm Smarter than You" Face
Annie hates the vacuum. She’s not like normal dogs, who dislike the sound of the vacuum. Oh no, our Annie couldn’t be so pedestrian. She isn’t even bothered by the sound of rolling thunder from the machine like so many other dogs. If you accidentally bump her with it while vacuuming, then she’ll leap up in surprise and go somewhere else, but that almost never happens. I suspect it almost never happens because I almost never vacuum, but that’s just a theory I’m working on. To date, there has been no conclusive evidence proving my involvement in Annie’s vacuum cleaner-related behaviors. (more…)

Annie, Babies and Fimbo

Blinky
Our house is loaded with stuff. I like stuff, the kids like stuff, we all like stuff. This love of stuff has lead to a house filled with trinkets, toys, and other shiny items that we couldn’t resist. Every so often we purge some of the stuff, but no matter how often we do this, we seem to continuously find more stuff.

I blame myself, since I am the chief hoarder of stuff. From guitars to fountain pens to computers to Lego kits, I have some pretty fine stuff. Really though, when it comes right down to it, it’s all just stuff. That’s how Annie sees it all, I’m sure. Maybe she has different categories for our stuff. Perhaps Tasty, crunchy, soft and pointy might be some of her descriptions for our stuff. Maybe she sorts it by smell instead. In any event, she doesn’t seem to understand that it’s not all her stuff. (more…)

Annie and the Dog Catcher Man

Annie is a destroyer of toys. She has been known to tear the heart out of stuffed toys, pull the squeaker out of rubber toys, and has even destroyed a soccer ball or two. Annie isn’t a keepsake-toy kind of dog like Cozy was. Cozy loved her Kong more than life itself, and we have hundreds of pictures to prove it. Annie has no special toy like that, but prefers to play with whatever is at hand – preferably something that she shouldn’t have.

There is one toy that she hasn’t destroyed, and her apparent respect for the toy fascinates me. The toy in question has been given the clever name of The Dog Catcher Man. Why? Because it’s shaped like a little man and has the word “Dogcatcher” on the front. I told you it was a clever name.

The Dog Catcher Man is a rubber squeaky toy like you’d find in any pet shop. It’s not a robust toy, and it is no way special except that it was purchased some thirteen years ago. Why do we have a 13 year old dog toy? This toy is special; this was Cozy’s toy. (more…)

Guinness and the Air Conditioner

It’s been hot here in the northeast. One day last week it was 105 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s 735 degrees in dog years… or something. It was hot. Stupid-hot. Not only was it hot, but the humidity here in New Jersey makes it feel like you’re walking through hot Jello all day. Hot sticky Jello with angry people floating in it. Yum

We wanted three things when we bought our house: Central air, a basement, and a fireplace.  We got the fireplace, and the house, location and everything else was perfect so we bought it without the required basement or central air. We then proceeded to sweat the perspiration of the damned for the next fifteen years. OK, so maybe that’s an exaggeration, and we only sweat the perspiration of the darned, but dammit—it was hot! (more…)

Stuff Annie has Destroyed

As anyone who has ever owned a puppy will tell you, they like to chew stuff. Now having a puppy is one thing, and we thought we had done a pretty good job of puppy proofing our house when we got Annie. As we would come to learn, puppy-proof did not mean Annie-proof.

I decided it would be fun to recount a partial list of items that Annie has destroyed, or at least attempted to destroy. I thought it would be a quick project. I was wrong.

Annie, like any puppy, didn’t mean to destroy beloved items. I doubt she even knew that any item was more or less valuable than any other. I could wax philosophical about  dogs not caring for the perceived value of things, but I think I can sum up her lack of appreciation for the finer things in life in a far simpler way: She’s a dog. (more…)

How To Photograph Your Big Black Dog

I get asked over and over again, “How do you take those pictures of your dogs? Anytime I take a picture of my Newfie (Or other black dog), all I get is a big black smudge!” Here are some tricks I recommend to people to help take better pictures of their pets. Some you’ll find easy to replicate, while others might take some practice and/or equipment. Either way I bet that if you follow my advice, you’ll take better pictures of any pet, but most especially of big black dogs

Gear

First lets talk about gear. Do you know what the first question anyone asks me when they like one of my photos is? ” Almost every time I get asked, “What kind of camera did you use?”

Now can you guess what the first question asked of me is when the picture sucks? It’s usually, “Who took that picture?” (more…)

Annie, Guinness and the Mashed Potatoes

One day after coming home from somewhere I don’t recall, having done something unrelated, we were greeted by something we couldn’t believe: the wonder of snow inside our house.

I was pretty sure that snow wasn’t supposed to fall indoors – at least not in the summertime. Yet the floors were dusted with snow, as were the piano bench, the walls, the dog toys, and the ruined canister of bread crumbs resting at the top of the stairs.

Wait, what? (more…)

Annie and the Towels

Annie has a towel problem. We’re not sure why, and we’re not sure how it started, but it’s pure Annie. If you’re like me, then you’re probably assuming that Annie’s towel problem would be as simple as a bad dog stealing towels. An overgrown puppy stealing stuff from the hamper is far too pedestrian an activity for Miss Annie, Ferret-Dog of Newfoundland. Annie has a far more peculiar problem, that I had to be shown first hand. I simply did not believe the stories my lovely wife and children were telling me. I had never seen Annie’s towel problem, and I have a pretty strong suspicion as to why that is. You see, I too have a towel problem. (more…)